Be mindful to boost workplace confidence

You walk into a networking event by yourself. You don’t know anyone but you know that there are some good contacts for you in the room. You felt uncomfortable about going but managed to get yourself there. Now what?

 

You notice yourself leaning against a wall and think, “How should I stand? I look awkward?” You see groups of people talking and think, “I should go over there, but what should I say?” You feel yourself getting nervous and you start to notice your heart pound and you feel short of breath.

 

As all of this is happening, what are you focused on?  Yourself.

 

When you focus on yourself, you become more self conscious. This makes you less comfortable and confident.

 

One powerful solution is to learn how to focus your attention outside of yourself. When you focus externally rather than internally, your worries subside and you get engaged in the situation.

 

This tool works great for interpersonal situations, but holds true for many things. It is a core tenet of mindfulness and it allows you to:

 

·         Be fully present in the moment

·         End the vicious cycle of worrying

·         Enjoy what’s happening around you

·         Be more focused and productive

 

So how do you focus externally?

 

One simple and tangible way is to use your five senses.

 

Practice taking in information from the world around you with your senses. At the networking event, you’re listening to what others are saying. You’re observing their facial expressions. You’re noticing the smell of the food and the temperature of the air.

 

You can practice this skill in everyday situations. If you go for a walk, observe the smells, sights, sounds, tastes, and feel of the air on your skin and ground under your feet.

 

The key is that you do all of this with a nonjudgmental attitude. This means that you don’t observe the facial expressions of others and think, “What are they thinking of me?”

 

You simply observe.

 

This is one of those things that is complicated in its simplicity. It will require practice, but the more you do it, the more you’ll be able to take control of your attention and turn it external when you need to.

Comments

[Hugo Lembert]

Great Insight.

You are correct in affirming what triggers anxiety. We live in a culture of instant gratification. Our expectations of ourselves and of those around us is quite high. Digital media has propelled this condition.

Moreover, the digital media revolution has flooded our brains with information. Personally, I think as a society, we are on "information overload" It is simply overwhelming! I believe many of us are just pressured to keep up - to move a lot faster than we can both physically and psychologically.

The Digital Media Age makes it even more of a challenge to manage your time, balance your life and appreciate what God has given you. We are constantly speculating, looking into the future for answers.

I have read a few books and there is one that addresses this issue to the point. Eckhart Toll's book "The Power of Now" offers invaluable insight. I learned that living the present and focusing on what is really important to you and your world is a good place to start your journey to success - both at home and work.

[J. Ross Folkes]

Your insights are right on the money.
Working with the basic tenant Mindfulness, what is needed is experience to understand it.To overcome the blockages people have, we are beta testing a game that creates an alternative world, in which people experience interpersonal networking that is revealing, instructive and fun. It's called "the Networking Challenge" Here's the scenario: 1.) You've decided to spend $5,000, travel 5000 miles, and are now in a room of 5000 strangers. 2 What are going to do? email me if you would like to here more.