Is Self Confidence Learned or Inborn?

I've been asked a lot of questions lately about confidence and whether people can really learn to be more confident or if it's an inborn trait. Of course I believe and research indicates that it's primarily learned (or I wouldn't have written a book on it), and that anyone can be a confident leader in their careers and lives.

But to present the other side, there are several characteristics that are heritable (inborn or genetic) that can help people to feel more confident. These include:

• Attractiveness. Attractive people tend to feel more self-confident. Cross-cultural studies have found that humans respond to certain aspects of facial features, such as symmetry, as being attractive. Perception of body characteristics (such as overall weight, waist to hip ratio) vary more across cultures in terms of what people find attractive, although in most western cultures waist to hip ratio in women is a strong predictor of the perception of attractiveness.

• Height. Studies in the U.S. have shown that most CEOs are above average height. Height is associated with power which is associated with self confidence. Height is primarily genetically determined.

• Intelligence. Twin studies have shown that general intelligence factor (traditional measures of IQ) are roughly 70% genetic. Intelligent people tend to have confidence in presenting their ideas and in their abilities.

• Extroversion. Extroversion is a personality characteristic which tends to be a trait (inborn). Extroversion can help people to feel more comfortable and confident in interpersonal situations.

NOW...

That I've presented this side, I'd like to share how even those primarily heritable factors can in fact be influenced by your actions. If the aspects of confidence that are more genetically based can be modified, then imagine how much control you have over ALL the aspects of confidence which are less inborn.

• Attractiveness. Obviously you cannot change your facial proportions (without plastic surgery of course), but there is a lot that you can do to influence your attractiveness factor. Women can learn how to apply makeup to flatter their features. A great hair cut does wonders for both men and women. Learning what colors look good on you can brighten up your face. Facial expression (the art of body language which can be learned) makes a huge difference...

• Height. Okay, before you think I'm crazy, I realize that you cannot literally make yourself taller. I wish we could. However, body posture has a dramatic impact on our perception of height. You want to think both in terms of height (standing tall) and space. People who have power take up more space with open body posture. Practice keeping your shoulders back, your neck stretched up from the base, and chin very slightly raised.

• Intelligence. Studies of genetic intelligence measure general intellectual abilities. Studies on emotional intelligence, on the other hand, show that it is primarily learned. Emotional intelligence has recently been shown in scientific research to have dramatic impact on confidence and success, perhaps even more so in today's world than general IQ.

• Extroversion. It is unlikely that an extreme introvert will turn into an extreme extrovert, but you can learn conversational skills and other interpersonal skills to be more extroverted in various situations. Also, you don't HAVE to be extroverted to be confident. I recommend that introverts see their introversion as a strength and use their natural abilities to think introspectively, be self aware, listen to their intuition, and connect with people on a deep level to build confidence. These are all emotional intelligence skills, and in fact, self awareness is arguably the most important emotional intelligence skill.

SO,

Are you destined to your current confidence quotient?

I say no.

What do you think?

Comments

[Rick Simmons]

The age old question between what is part of our upbringing versus breed into us. My feeling is that yes there are certain tendencies that comes through genetics but that circumstances can change things. I have no scientific reasoning behind this except observation. I was very shy in front of people and i see it in both my daughters but now I do speaking engagements with hundreds in the audience and enjoy it.

[Larina Kase]

Yes, Rick, science supports your observations. Development interacts with temperment and environment... certain tendencies are more genetic or fixed than others, but most things are quite malleable.